Fright to Tampa pt. 2
8/5/2007 11:35 AM
So, I avoid near death..well in the general neighborhood of death. Our plane lands I give an elated sigh as the plane reaches across the wide run way but as I look out my elation turns to trepidation as I we pass several firefighting vehicles. I logically think they are there for the “safety” but my panic has a different tone. But in spite my dread we land perfectly well. Now is were the real fun begins. Sitting in the front of the plane I’m giving a wide view of all exiting the plane…and now the real chaos begins. Now, I’m a big believer in the lack of competency of a good deal of the airline industry. They care barely get our bags out of the airport and we trust them to get hundreds of us up and down thousands at time a day. And seeing some of the people working within the airport I truly am surprised its not raining planes (“Hallelujah! It’s raining planes”). But I am a stronger proponent in letting people do their jobs. I wasn’t expecting an answer the moment I left the jet way…nor were a lot of my co first class passengers. Seemed a seasoned lot. And we gathered in the chairs out side the gate but now…the steerage. The rabble in the back of the plane (who I typically count myself as) are on the move. We can hear them rumbling their way up the jet way. Quite honestly, I would not have been surprised as they rounded the corner to see them in eastern European peasant garb and armed with torches and pitchforks. “Blah, blah, tell us what is going on…blather, blather, blather”. Now I can’t quite place the dialect but I’m sure I detected plenty of “Southern Stupid”. “WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO? How am I gonna get compensated?” Good god, they already have their hand out…I feel like I’m in the sequel to “Run, Ronnie, Run”. The guy ate counter looks like he’s at the ass end of 12 hour shift and he wishes he called in sick. He’s on the phone…I’m sure getting info or calling for a riot squad with a water cannon. He’s doing the one finger up “just a moment” gesture. I’m sure he’d rather be holding up another finger entirely. An elderly black woman comes by she looks happy to be alive. I offer her my seat. She thanks me and mentions this was her first trip on a plane and she doesn’t know what to do. One of the first class business boys and I reassure it will be ok. I tell her “There’s a whole extra jet someplace they weren’t counting on they’ll figure it out.“ She borrows the business boys phone and makes a call to her sister in Florida. “Jesus, I’m just glad to be alive…”. It’s a nice counter balance to the passion play going on at the counter. Which is now swarming like a shark week feeding frenzy. The gate agent’s PA has cut out so now he’s forced to shout his announcement. The facts…plane is disabled, working on fixing it if they can’t then another plane is flying in a couple of hours that we’re going use. They are going to give some vouchers for food that you can use in the restaurant or bar...ding! Hello. Crisis averted. The airline ticket counter resembles the science video of hundreds of sperm try penetrate the egg. Business boy saunters up and gets one for me and the elderly lady. Then and episode of the “Amazing Race” breaks out. A woman, her face flush and sweat laden, wearing a Mickey Mouse Tee that most girls in college wear as a night shirt on her its about 2 sizes too small. She now shakes a pudgy, sweat laden finger at the gate agent “…are due on “tha” Disney Cruise at 5. What are you gonna do?” She continues stressing time and time again it’s a “Disney” cruise. I think she’s trying to name drop but its as useful as saying McDonalds. The gate agent has gathered himself for her. He’s ready for her and he’s not going to lose to her. Then in a flurry she decides to take action in her own hands and runs down the hall with her family in tow. “We’re gonna find another flight!” It really is like watching the Amazing Race. Business Boy and I exchange glances…”she’ll be back.”.